340 Days and Counting…

It used to be that my weight and all talk of it could put me in the worst funk, but there’s a new darkness in town. These days my weight is pretty much managed. I’ve altered the way I eat, am trying to talk myself into exercising to accelerate my weight loss(still working hard on that), and have no real problems avoiding those foods that I absolutely love by using a strict “it’s poison and if you eat it you’re gonna die!” mantra. It usually works, but when it doesn’t, I exercise the craving in a variety of ways.

Sometimes I give in to it.

Hell, there are only so many times you can go to a movie and NOT eat the popcorn! I am only human. Or if the noodle craving gets too strong, I’ll indulge in some rice noodles or glass noodles (made from mung beans and both are gluten and wheat free) from my favorite Thai place down the street. But those needs are so few and far between that I don’t even consider them cheating.

Cheating will absolutely be taking place on Thanksgiving this year with the creation of my favorite dish in the world: macaroni and cheese (4 types of cheese, eggs, heavy cream, various spices, and this year I’m adding bacon!). It is a killer, so it’s only served once a year. It’s so devastating to a diet that I’ve scheduled a ten day fast and cleanse that will begin two weeks after Thanksgiving (can’t abandon the leftovers you know!).

So the constant darkness that used to be my weight is now just a cloudy day. Occasionally it rains, but mostly is overcast and chilly.

No, the new darkness is unemployment.

California has not been conducive to continued employment for me over the past seventeen years.  Now, I am the first to admit that it wasn’t always my employers fault when it came to me being unemployed. I actively contributed to my being laid off on a few occasions.

But not on all of them.

A few truly weren’t my fault at all and one was the Idiot Bush’s fault completely.

Damn, I really miss that job.

Anyway, I haven’t worked a day in 340 days. Have I’ve gone a bit batty? You bet your ass I have. This isn’t like the other times. Then, I was usually working temp jobs within the six months of getting on Unemployment (the money runs out in 20 weeks). The temp jobs didn’t pay a lot, but they were relatively plentiful.

Not this time.

I call two agencies every week and they never have anything. I’ve tried to sign up with two more only to be told that there were no jobs. I’ve been on only one interview in the past nine months, when during my previous experience I was interviewed forty-seven times.

When I listen to the Republican assholes talk about the Unemployed like we’ve earned our difficulties or worse, haven’t earned the money we receive from the government, it makes me want to kill. How dare they say that we shouldn’t be helped, shouldn’t get the money back that we give up from every paycheck to help keep us afloat. Who the fuck are these assholes to hold what is rightfully ours away like an overgrown bully stealing lunch money?

Sorry for the profanity, but every morning when I wake up and there are literally no prospects for employment (even the online job site listings are thin), I think about all those assholes with their money and influence and complete hate and disdain for anyone not making the requisite $250,000 a year and wish I had the power to show them the error of their arrogance.

But for now I endure…

340 Days and counting. ~vm~


~ by wastedlife40 on September 11, 2010.

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President Barack Obama ... photos, videos & a word or two

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