Consistency is an elusive thing…

So, I’m not the most consistent person.

It’s true it’s been two months since I’ve written a word on this blog and I hope that some of you are interested in why. Well, so am I. I know that might sound strange and really kind of dumb, but sometimes I just don’t have anything to say.

At least not about food.

Ask me anything about the state of politics and I’ll talk your ear off, but get me started about how I’m doing on this so called “lifestyle change” aka diet, and I’ll clam up. I think I get annoyed having to think about it at all. Saying nothing and writing less seems to keep the fear of it failing at bay. I don’t think it’s healthy to ignore what I’m doing, but I don’t think it’s all that healthy to dwell on it either.

I’m coming up on a weaning week. That’s the week before a fast when I take that time to empty the fridge and my head.  I found that if I take the time to really concentrate on what’s coming up, I get through my fasting weeks mentally intact. My last fast was going so well, I extended it three additional days! Can you imagine? I got to day five and it was like I was only on day two. I didn’t feel the usual tension or desperation at all. I only stopped because I had an event coming up and it takes several days to break a fast

I lost twenty-six pounds that week.

You know fasting can be very difficult on your dieting progress. You see every time you fast and lose those great amounts of weight, you must be prepared for your finally tally to be less than half the number you lost. You lose more water than you do fat, so when you begin eating normally again, some of that weight has to come back. The trick is to understand that and to be okay with it.

I do. And I am.

I’ve lost about 120lbs since February (last time I did that it took eight months!) and I know that my weight loss will begin to slow down to what I lost last week: about 3lbs. That’s okay. I figure the fasting will keep me from plateauing for too long, and frankly, I’ve come too really like doing it. It’s liberating not having to think about food. My thinking sort of devolves into distinguishing between sweet and salty, trying to find and keep a balance so that when and if I have cravings, there are ways to quickly curb them.

And with my job situation being so dire, fasting has become an economic salvation. All I need is water, bouillon, tea, and coffee.  Add some milk for the occasional protein shake (got loads of protein power), and I’m in food for a long time. These are the times I’m thankful that I horde. I’ve got ridiculous amounts of tea and coffee just waiting to be drunk.

But of course, I hope I won’t have to depend on my shopping compulsion to feed myself.

Sorry, that was a little dark.

Click here for a real smile and thank you for listening.


~ by wastedlife40 on July 11, 2010.

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